Family Tech

Your Parental Controls Map

Five layers. Four jobs. The tools that actually cover each one.

“Parental controls” is really four different jobs, spread across five different places, and most tools only cover a few of them. This map shows which tool does which job, so you can stop paying for overlap and fill the gaps.

Sarah Kimmel

“No parental control system is going to be absolutely perfect… If you have something valuable, you put it in a locked safe, put it in the locked car, put it in the locked garage inside your locked house. It's not impossible, because it never is impossible, but it's going to take a lot of work.”

Sarah Kimmel, from my original layers video

The whole map

Each row is a layer. Each column is a job. Tap a layer to jump to its tools.

Which of the four jobs each of the five layers covers
Layer Filtering Time Limits Monitoring Location
1. On the device Yes Yes Yes Yes
2. Inside the app Yes Depends on the app Depends on the app Depends on the app
3. On your Wi-Fi Yes Yes Yes No
4. On your cell plan Yes Yes Yes Yes
5. Conversations Covers what the settings miss
  • Filtering blocks what you don't want them to see.
  • Time Limits set how much time they get, and when.
  • Monitoring shows you what's happening in their apps.
  • Location shows you where the phone is.

Show me tools for:

A quick honesty note: the Amazon links, Bark, and Canopy below are my affiliate or discount links, so I may earn a little if you use them. It never costs you extra. Everything else is here because it's a tool I'd recommend for the job it does, with no deal attached.

On the device

Built into the phone or tablet, free, and already there. Start here.

Apple Screen Time

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Covers Location

Already on every iPhone and iPad.

Google Family Link

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Covers Location

For Android phones and Chromebooks. You can run it from an iPhone.

Canopy

Paid, 20% off with code FAMILYTECH
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Covers Location

Blocks nudity and sexting as it happens, in any app on the phone.

More about Canopy

This one lives here instead of Inside the App because it works on the device itself. It scans photos and what's on the screen in real time, across whatever app your kid is using, so it behaves more like Screen Time or Family Link than like Bark. It also blocks categories, apps, and websites, sets downtime, and sends location alerts.

Inside the app

Each app's own parent settings. They're free, but they only cover that one app, so set up the ones your kid actually uses.

Roblox

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Daily time limits, game maturity levels, chat, and spending caps.

More about Roblox

Link your own parent account to theirs to set a daily time limit, choose which maturity level of games they can play, control who can chat with them, cap monthly spending, and see their friends list.

YouTube

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Content levels, blocked channels, and timers, including one just for Shorts.

More about YouTube

There are three options depending on age: YouTube Kids, a supervised account for tweens, and supervised teen accounts. For younger kids, you can also see what they've been watching. The video link starts at the YouTube part of my Family Link guide.

TikTok Family Pairing

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Daily limits, bedtime blocking, Restricted Mode, and who they follow.

More about TikTok

Family Pairing links your TikTok account to theirs, so you'll need one of your own. You can block the app during school or bedtime and see who they follow and who follows them. You can't read their messages.

Instagram Teen Accounts

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Strict settings by default, plus daily limits and who they've messaged.

More about Instagram

Teen Accounts start with the strictest content and messaging settings turned on. Add supervision from your own Instagram account to set a daily limit, block the app at night, and see who they've messaged in the past week, without reading the messages themselves.

Snapchat Family Center

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Doesn’t cover Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Covers Location

Their friends, who they chat with, and live location. No time limits.

More about Snapchat

You can see how much time they spend in the app, limit sensitive content, and stop My AI (Snapchat's chatbot) from replying to them. Ask them to share their live location with you and you'll get a heads-up when they arrive at or leave places like home or school. It shows time spent but doesn't limit it, and you can't read their chats.

Discord Family Center

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Who they talk to, which servers they're in, downtime, and spending caps.

More about Discord

See who they've added, messaged, and called, which servers (Discord's group chat spaces) they've joined, and what they've bought. You can choose who can send them friend requests and DMs, blur or block sensitive content, set a monthly spending cap, and schedule downtime when Discord is off. You can't read their messages.

Fortnite (Epic Games)

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Doesn’t cover Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Daily time limits, chat controls, and a PIN before any purchase.

More about Fortnite

Epic's controls cover Fortnite and its other games: daily time limits with a weekly playtime email, age-rating limits, who can voice and text chat with them, and a PIN before any real-money purchase.

ChatGPT

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Doesn’t cover Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Extra content protections, quiet hours, and features you can switch off.

More about ChatGPT

Link your account to your teen's to add extra content protections, set quiet hours when it can't be used, and switch off features like voice mode and image generation. You can't see their chats. You'd only get a notification if there's a serious safety concern.

Bark

Paid
  • Covers Filtering
  • Doesn’t cover Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Flags bullying, predators, and self-harm language, so you don't read every message.

More about Bark

Bark connects into the accounts your kid actually uses (texts, email, YouTube, Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, Discord) and flags concerning content like cyberbullying, predatory behavior, and self-harm language, so you don't have to read every message yourself. What it can see depends on the phone: Discord, for example, is covered on Android but not on iPhone.

On your Wi-Fi

Covers everything on your home Wi-Fi, even devices you don't own. It stops at the front door, and when they switch to cell data.

Gryphon AX

Paid
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

A router built around parental controls.

OpenDNS

Free
  • Covers Filtering
  • Doesn’t cover Time Limits
  • Doesn’t cover Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Powerful, but you set it up and build the block lists yourself.

CleanBrowsing

Paid, from ~$8.99/mo
  • Covers Filtering
  • Doesn’t cover Time Limits
  • Doesn’t cover Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

Like OpenDNS, with ready-made filters instead of lists you build by hand.

NETGEAR Nighthawk RS700S WiFi 7

Paid, ~$7.99/mo
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

A top all-in-one router. The parental controls need the subscription.

Synology WRX560

No subscription
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

All the parental controls come with the router. Nothing to pay monthly.

More about Synology

Synology calls its parental controls Safe Access: website filtering, time limits and schedules, and daily or weekly activity reports, all included.

NETGEAR Orbi 770 WiFi 7 (mesh)

Paid, ~$7.99/mo after trial
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Doesn’t cover Location

For bigger homes that need mesh Wi-Fi (a few units around the house).

On your cell plan

Follows the SIM card, so it still works away from home. Usually a monthly add-on.

Verizon Smart Family

Paid
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Covers Location

AT&T Secure Family

Paid, $7.99/mo
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Covers Location

T-Mobile FamilyMode

Paid, $10/mo
  • Covers Filtering
  • Covers Time Limits
  • Covers Monitoring
  • Covers Location

Conversations

The layer no setting can replace, and the one that matters most.

“If they're coming to tell you that they came across something inappropriate… I always say, ‘Oh, thank you so much for telling me. I'm sorry that happened to you. Let's figure out how we can protect you so it doesn't happen again.’”

Sarah Kimmel

Eleven conversations worth having, one at a time: open the Conversations page

Books worth reading

  • Screenwise

    Devorah Heitner

    Practical, level-headed, and the closest in tone to how I'd want you to think about this.

    Find it on Amazon
  • 52 Modern Manners for Today's Teens (Vol. 1 & 2)

    Brooke Romney

    From my own interview with Brooke. Short, doable, one manner a week.

    Find it on Amazon
  • The Tech-Wise Family

    Andy Crouch

    A values-first, practical way to decide what tech is actually for in your home.

    Find it on Amazon